- S.F. bus driver marks 40 years behind the wheel from San Francisco Bay Area News — — SFGate (A career spanning nearly three blocks of Mission ;)).

- Obama, in Europe, signs Patriot Act extension from San Francisco Bay Area News — — SFGate (Need to stage an addiction to emergency powers intervention...).

- Tornadoes, climate change, and real scientific literacy from Boing Boing (Good article).

- Mayor signs Yellow Pages law restricting distribution from San Francisco Bay Area News — — SFGate (Excellent. Now get rid of the Examiner as well.).

- Sarkozy questions 'neutral' net from BBC News - Home (Right, because someone might see a photo of someone in a burqa).

- Many baby items found to contain toxic chemicals from San Francisco Bay Area News — — SFGate (Goes up to 100% once baby has actually used them.).

- Free-floating 'planets' found that have no star from BBC News - Home (Any headed this way?).

- Preview Coming Bay Bridge Road Change With New App from KQED News Fix (Android users smart enough to drive without an app preview...).

- Clegg unveils Lords reform plans from BBC News - Home (Better idea: http://goo.gl/6RRdf).

- Pesticide bombing of Farallones mice spurs debate from San Francisco Bay Area News — — SFGate (Nooo. Send cats, then dogs, then Cthulu!).

- Worst of rain may miss Bay to Breakers from San Francisco Bay Area News — — SFGate (Fingers crossed!).

- In 3D - ants as you have never seen them before from BBC News - Home (Um, no. Unless you're a cyclops this is exactly how you see ants.).

- Magna Carta: Live! from KQED News Fix (Should really go and see this...).

- Police called as dog bites voters from BBC News - Home (It's a case of 'first past the pug').

- Photo: Obama and National Security team during Osama kill operation from Boing Boing (That looks like one lame situation room.).

- SF Chronicle video prompts White House threat from San Francisco Bay Area News — — SFGate (Petty. What did you just say about having more important things to do? #Obama).

- Mayor Ed Lee Opposed to Shark Fin Ban from KQED News Fix (Boo temporary Mayor!).

- SF Board of Supervisors Vote to Oppose GGNRA Dog Policy from KQED News Fix (Yay supes!).

- Go the Fuck to Sleep: a storybook for exhausted parents from Boing Boing (Pre-ordered).

- Reserve marine life 'flourishing' from BBC News - Home (Are scallops in some sense not wildlife?).

- Homes' solar panels often boost values from San Francisco Bay Area News — — SFGate (Yippee! That was my theory when we did it...).

- What would public broadcasting do with $178 billion? from All Salon (No fly zone over Arizona!).

- Bernalwood’s Wild Kingdom, or How To Deal Unwanted Guests from Bernalwood (It's like Cloverfield in a garage!).

- EU envoy defends Bahrain police from BBC News - Home (How do we fire Robert Cooper? Seriously, how is a sniper and 'accident'?).

- Ecclestone stands by 'fake rain' from BBC News - Home (Next: RPGs).

- Obama's war tent from BBC News - Home (Surely he's just doing that to screw with Gaddafi?).

- Radiation Chart from xkcd (Radiation perspective...).

- Are cloth seats a public health hazard? Possibly. from Boing Boing (Of course. And which Muppet decided to carpet BART?).

- Chrysler Tells It How It Is from Failblog After Dark (It looks real - someone got fired for tweeting this).

- VIDEO: Murakami's book on silver screen from BBC News - Home (I hope they didn't screw it up...).

- Facebook adds suicide help system from BBC News - Home (Also needed, a 'net' underneath the wall.).

- What should you do if a cash machine overpays? from BBC News - Home (Really BBC, you needed to crowd source this one?).

- Herpetology from xkcd.com ('herpetology is a silly field').

- Internet Up For Nobel Peace Prize Again, Let’s Hope It Wins This Time from TechCrunch (I guess Al Gore would accept the prize?).

- Dear Oprah: Some thoughts on your credibility. from Boing Boing (In her defense, she has a lot more hours to fill these days...).

- US not defending gay marriage ban from BBC News - Home (About time).

- Cleaning the air would limit short-term climate warming from Global Climate Change - NASA's Eyes on the Earth (An interesting twofer).

- What happens when you stick your head in a particle accelerator from Boing Boing (I used to have nightmares about this while commuting on 280).

- Rolls-Royce to show electric car from BBC News - Home (It can travel a foot between recharges...).

- England reading test to include non-words from BBC News - Home (This really seems very silly).

- What do you put in nine bins? from BBC News - Home (One of them is just for cats.).

- Fan held over 'air crash mockery' from BBC News - Home (Bad taste, but should you really be arrested for causing 'alarm or distress'?).

- Keen On… MIT Professor Says Robotic Moment Has Arrived, And We Are Toast (TCTV) from TechCrunch (Bollocks. Or rather, replace robot with dog or cat and get the same result.).

- 100-ft-long drug-smuggling, Narco-crafted submarine discovered in Colombia from Boing Boing (Ooooh, will they be auctioning it off?).

- Tarmac lorry sheds its load on M3 from BBC News - Home (Sounds like one hell of a speed bump.).

- Playmobil Stop Motion Joy Division from Boing Boing (I'm hoping this is a whole YouTube genre...).

- After Failing To Get Hacked Last Year, Google Paying For Chrome To Be In Pwn2Own 2011 from TechCrunch (If you're still not using Chrome this should provide some inspiration to make the switch. There's really nothing better, other than telneting to port 80.).

- Worries if Cal Fire pulls out of wildland areas from San Francisco Bay Area News — — SFGate (Probably a fair shift.).

- S.F. Yellow Pages ban to be considered from San Francisco Bay Area News — — SFGate (Please get rid of the Examiner as well.).

- Microsoft warns on browser flaw from BBC News - Home (Main flaw would be still using IE...).

- Let’s Compete on Innovation Rather Than Patents from TechCrunch (+1).

- Turning body heat into energy from BBC News - Home (Isn't it already energy?).

- Microsoft warns on IE browser bug from BBC News - Home (Microsoft recommends using the 'Enhanced Mitigation Experience Toolkit 2.0' ... I'd suggest switching to Chrome.).

- Local Cartographer Creates “Islands of San Francisco” Map from Bernalwood (Handy).

- Microsoft Allen's case dismissed from BBC News - Home (It's a temporary win, but please patent terrorists everywhere fuck off and find something productive to do with your life.).

- Dirk Gently BBC trailer from Boing Boing (Yes, please BBC America!).

- Guest Week: Zach Weiner (SMBC) from xkcd.com (Interactive guest XKCD goodness).

- Vitamin D from Information Is Beautiful (Need more sunshine!).

- Zediva Streams You Movies From Actual DVD Players, Argues It’s Legal from TechCrunch (Clever).

- Palin says she could beat Obama from BBC News - Home (McCain, your legacy is thoroughly fucked.).

- Obama vows to improve Muslim ties from BBC News - Home (Tip: stop killing Muslims).

- Flash vs. Batteries from Boing Boing (Because it has to check for updates every five seconds?).

- Electric current 'boosts maths' from BBC News - Home (Yes, every time you answer incorrectly...).

- What do new passports say about the UK? from BBC News - Home (At least it still "requires" other countries to let us pass without let or hindrance, unlike the less forceful US passport...).

- General Motors in huge share sale from BBC News - Home (It really doesn't seem quite right to call it an 'initial' public offering.).

- Why We Need To Abolish Software Patents from TechCrunch (+1).

- Wikipedia’s Lamest Edit Wars from Information Is Beautiful (must click through!).

- Record broken for number of 'pirates' in one place from BBC News - Home (Um, is that just because the Guinness people are afraid of going to Somalia?).

- Ghosts of WWII: Sergey Larenkov's Photoshopped historic photos blend past with present from Boing Boing (Impressed.).

- Sandwich Monday: 'The Breakfast Club' Edition from NPR Blogs: Wait Wait ... Don't Tell Me! (Sandwich Monday is now funnier than the actual show.).

- Frogger from xkcd.com (don't miss the alt text).

- Patent Trolling Doesn’t Pay: Intellectual Ventures Shows A Negative 73 Percent Return from TechCrunch (Good news. Vampire bastards.).

- Say fat not obese, urges minister from BBC News - Home (also 'a bit poorly' rather than 'cancerous').

- MoD 'must not live beyond means' from BBC News - Home (Easy fix... bring troops home and send National Audit Office to scold Iraq and Afghanistan into submission.).

- Vatican mulls sex abuse of impaired adults from All Salon (Hint: if you don't know the number for your local police department 112 will work on most mobile phones.).

- Call for school rugby scrum ban from BBC News | News Front Page | World Edition (Where was Professor Pollock when I was at school?).

- Grandmothers link orcas to humans from BBC News | News Front Page | World Edition (Could it be that the mothers also have mothers? Like necessarily?).

- Oklahoma police tase an 86-year-old bedridden grandmother from Boing Boing (Molly, pay attention!).

- Oklahoma police tase an 86-year-old bedridden grandmother from Boing Boing (Molly, pay attention!).

- Police come to the rescue of delayed Ryanair passengers from BBC News | News Front Page | World Edition (Did they have to batter and fry the chocolate?).

- BP 'trusted partner' of Olympics from BBC News | News Front Page | World Edition (Appropriate given that much of the Olympic site is toxic sludge covered in a thin layer of plastic wrap...).

- Falls cost NHS millions each day from BBC News | News Front Page | World Edition (Are they falling on expensive scanners or something?).

- When You Need to Sleep Through Your Child's Graduation Or Other Formal Occasion from NPR Blogs: Wait Wait ... Don't Tell Me! (Pillow Tie!).

- Whales 'offset carbon emissions' from BBC News | News Front Page | World Edition (You're talking carbon offsets).

- Should nuts be banned on commercial flights? from All Salon (Ban them? I can't remember the last time I was served anything as luxurious as a peanut on a US flight...).

- Call to regulate artificial life from BBC News | News Front Page | World Edition (Public should have studied harder at school then.).

- City of Smarty Pantses from Spots Unknown (Says more about cost of living maybe?).

- "A hundred mile oil lake at the bottom of the Gulf that's 500 feet deep." from jwz (Hopefully this guy doesn't know what he's talking about...).

- Torchwood returns for new series from BBC News | News Front Page | World Edition (Yippee!).

- Dolphin uses iPad as way to communicate with humans from Boing Boing ("S_ l_*g *nd th*nks !or *ll the !ish" - but what can it mean?).

- Feds meet with film director Cameron on oil spill from SFGate: Top News Stories (They can get rid of it in post-production?).